Priorities

getting on a jet plane to leave my children does not get any easier.  no matter what i'm leaving to go and do or how many times i've done it before, the pain in my heart is still just as rough as the first time!  heath and i boarded the flight to go to norway last weekend, and as the plane door was closing, i began to feel breathless.  why couldn't i breathe?  what was happening to me?  why does my stomach ache, my mind feel foggy and my heart beat fast?

it was then heath leaned over and said something to me with a big smile on his face.  i'm not sure what it was because apparently i'd lost my hearing in that moment as well.  and it happened, i began to cry the cry that only kids can cry.  the cry where your lip can't help but tremble, the tears spill out and your stomach convulses in and out.  my face scrunched up and i had to cover my lips before they fell right off, melted off, broke off....i was a mess about leaving my children.  they are constantly my top priority.  i had been with them for almost 5 straight weeks.  they'd had no school, no nothing.  just me and them.  they had only had two different nights that they'd gone to stay with my parents over the holidays.  i'd gotten used to having them constantly with me.  and shockingly....i loved it.

i thought for a moment that maybe heath would cry too just watching me try to pull myself together.  i quickly went back to my magazine and tried to see through the tears as they fell down my face and dropped on the pages.  it's my birthday!  this should be happy!  happy birthday to me, dag-nabbit.  pull yourself together woman!

getting on a jet plane to leave my children does not get any easier.

once we arrived in tromso, norway, i had started to feel a little more relaxed.  we had a late lunch, a quick nap (yes...a nap...and the beds were made so that we each had our own blanket!...be still my heart!)  then, we were able to talk to the kids and i felt even more relaxed.  that night we went out into the snow covered mountains to try and see the northern lights on an "aurora safari".  so cool.  we didn't see the lights but we had a great time sledding on tiny sleds, eating reindeer stew and talking to the guide about typical days in norway.  learning about others' cultures never gets old for me!

the next day was more time to spend and have fun with heath.  it's amazing what a couple of days away can do for a marriage!  it takes me a few hours, if not a full day, to get out of "mommy mode" and then i become me.  just plain old me.  which is not so plain actually.  heath and i are both jokesters so we are constantly laughing and doing rediculous things.  we enjoy adventure so we seek fun and excitement.  we enjoy shopping together, walking together, sitting together.  we enjoy one another.  we compliment one another well.  it's not that we forget these things, we just have jobs to do in this life.  as adults, as people, as parents....we all have priorities.  we get caught up in the things that we think need to be done.  but on this trip, nothing NEEDED to be done.

so we shopped, we ate, we slept, we talked.

kids?  what kids?  (i'm kidding....or am i?)

and we went dog sledding.

oh the dog sledding.  one of our most hysterical times on the trip was getting onto the dog sled as the dog trainer attached the dogs to the sled.  heath had all of his weight on that brake and yet those little dogs were jumping and howling with everything they had.  they were READY to go!  eager to get on that trail for a run!  we were hysterical with laughter before the sledding even started.

after being whipped in the face by sleet and snow, sledding for over an hour through wide open (pitch black) fields of white snow, lots of laughter and only one...okay, maybe two, near death experiences because of my driving, we stopped off for some more reindeer stew and hot tea.

even though this was my 36th birthday, you would have thought it was my 16th.  our maturity level, on the sled, was about just that.  sad but true.  the day had turned out to be everything and more.

when we left the following day, i was so glad that we'd decided to go. it was nice to get away and put work, children and life aside for just a little while.  it was great to put one another as the priority and focus on who we are as a couple.  it was a great reminder of how we got ourselves into the crazy fun life that we are in right now.

after we'd gotten home from the weekend, hugged the kids, kissed them goodnight and put them to bed.  life started up again:  heath began to pack for his next business trip and i began to get things ready for the kids and the upcoming school week.  yep, life picked right back up where we left off.

other priorities crept back into our lives.

the party was over.

after i'd gotten the kids clothes laid out for the next day, i decided to go and give myself a little birthday gift.  seems selfish, right?  i'd already gotten an amazing trip, some clothes and some cool boots..did i not mention the new boots.  they're cool.

my weekend away with heath had reminded me and solidified my belief that if we take time and we make time for one another, then we draw closer to one another.  i saw the great benefits that when we put one another as a priority, we make a better team.  a happier couple.  a healthier marriage.  no matter how difficult it is, no matter if we have time or not, no matter how much it might scare us...we need to make one another a priority.

so i pulled out my computer and filled out a little application for a mission trip to cambodia.  many of you know a piece of my heart was left over there during my first (and second) trip to serve those amazing children and show them God's love.  my goal this year is to draw closer to God.  to make Him a priority.  for me, serving Him is drawing closer to Him.  He wants nothing more than to have me close and keep me right in His big ole grip.

there is no better gift.

as i pushed, "send" on the computer, i couldn't help but think, happy birthday to me.  

Whole body on the breaks to keep the dogs still.  
We should have taken a picture of the dogs jumping
straight up and down to start running.

End of our sledding.  Dogs are finally calm.

After a yummy meal in our "tee pee type" tent.